I Love Edgar Ruiz - Part 1

Part 1: What Edgar brings to me

Like any other morning, I arrived early and sat down on my usual bench. I usually sit and read for two reasons: to wait for the start of school and to show kids teachers read. During this time various students happily interrupt me and I greet them. I enjoy asking them how they are doing and tell them to have a great day. It is a small but precious treasure to my day.

Friday morning started as usual. I arrived early and began reading. Yet, strangely, things seemed quiet and I was racing through my pages. It wasn’t until Edgar finally arrived that my world of teaching continued its course of change and discovery.

Our discussion started as normal. “Hi. How are you?” He sat down next to me and we then, almost serendipitously, started talking about his presence in the classroom. “It’s hard Mr. Najarro. I want to win the match!” (Edgar is a wrestling fan and I use winning a match as an allegory to behaving well). I ask if he has gone to the nurse’s office yet. “No, I can’t. I’m going to the doctor’s later and they told me not to take medication today because they are giving me a new prescription.” “Oh, ok,” I thought to myself. At that moment, something different and special happened.

Instead of thinking about what a difficult day Friday will be with Edgar not taking his medication, my mind, or more appropriately, my emotions, went to how much I love Edgar. He is the student that tells others to be quiet when I am teaching. He is the one student that tells others they need to be quiet and respect me. Essentially, “he has my back.” He quiets the class for me and dislikes anyone disrespecting my lessons. I don’t’ know what the catalyst was but instead of worrying, I quickly, and without thought or self-control, leaned over to Edgar and put one hand on his shoulder and my other hand on his heart. I put my head down and quietly told him: “Edgar. I will also love you. You are very special. You have a very kind and warm heart you just have to show that heart to us. Regardless of what you do, I will always love you. Just remember to show your heart to others.”

There was a moment of silence that last fives seconds but was deeper than time would allow explain.

A feeling of “we are going to achieve” was exchanged. The idea of team was constructed. The conversation was finished and the norm continued.

The conversation lingered but felt more than informed.

We eventually found ourselves in the classroom but I noticed Edgar’s presence: cold and aloof. Remembering from Literacy class, I wrote instead of asked: “What’s wrong.” A full page of conversation was compiled as Edgar explained how he felt disconnected from the class community and the teacher. He admitted to his wrongs, which I praised, and we made a list of solutions. The test came later in the day when he tends to begin to unravel.